Waking up with a sense of dread

Four years ago, I was this close to throwing in the towel at work.

Every morning, I would wake up with a mild sense of dread.

I was a partner at a consulting firm, and while I loved my teammates and we were doing important work with great clients... something didn't feel right.

The stress of client demands.

The worry about where the next project would come from.

The internal politics of our little team.

It was all getting too much for me.

Enter a wise guide

Just by chance, a friend, Tui Williams, called me up asking if I wanted some 1:1 workplace coaching.

She had just been through some training over in Canada and was looking for a student for her assessment. There would be no charge for what would otherwise be a $5,000 to $10,000 programme, as long as the sessions were recorded for marking.

In the first coaching call, it all came tumbling out.

I distinctly remember the tears of frustration and saying something like:

"I just don't know how much longer I can keep going at this pace."

Until that moment, I don't think I had realised how overwhelmed I felt. (My wife could probably guess.)

And in my mind, none of it was my fault. If only this person followed the process. If only our clients were less demanding.

If only...

if only...

The plan of action

Together, Tui and I created a plan that focused on three key areas:

• Connecting to what was most important to me
• Communicating my boundaries and needs to others
• Creating daily rhythms to protect my energy and attention.

I'd love to pretend I made immediate and noticeable changes overnight.

But I didn't. Oh no, sir!

I resisted the changes—sometimes consciously, but often subconsciously. Fortunately, Tui kept encouraging me to be kind and patient with myself.

Gradually, some small things began to shift. I started to regain some control over my workload, which brought my energy back. I became more comfortable saying "no" and taking responsibility for my own internal dialogue.

Eventually, I started to listen to my intuition... although in some cases, it still took years to listen to what it was telling me.

The turning point

Looking back, I can’t help but wonder about what would have happened if I hadn’t received that phone call from Tui.

That's why I'm focusing on coaching right now in my practice. Too many mid-career professionals and leaders are feeling overwhelmed, stressed and under pressure.

If anything in this story resonates, I'm creating a "10-Minute Clarity Worksheet" that guides you through a series of questions to clarify your biggest challenges and priorities.

If you're keen on receiving this, just reply to this email and let me know.

Otherwise, go well out there my friend!

Ngā mihi,
Paul